Archive for February, 2013

February 24, 2013

Last Minute Oscar Predictions

One of my good friends asked for my last minute Oscar predictions on facebook so I thought I would make them official and put them here. Enjoy the show!

If I disagree with what the majority of Oscar pundits are saying, I mention that. It happens 6 times – 8 including the short categories.

Picture:
Who I Think Will Win: Argo
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Lincoln (not my favorite movie, but should win)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Argo – it’s a really good movie, but there’s no subtext. It’s like a less exciting version of Ocean’s Eleven.
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): The Master

Director:
Who I Think Will Win: Steven Spielberg – Lincoln
Who People Think Will Win: Ang Lee – Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Steven Spielberg – Lincoln
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: David O. Russell – Silver Linings Playbook (but only because he’s mean. Look for a youtube video of him and Lily Tomlin).
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Kathryn Bigelow – Zero Dark Thirty

Actor:
Who I Think Will Win: Daniel Day-Lewis – Lincoln
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Daniel Day-Lewis – Lincoln
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Denzel Washington – Flight (If you watch Flight, 30 minutes in you think you are about to have a new favorite movie of all time, and then it just implodes in to derivative shit where Denzel barely manages to stand up straight let alone act).
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Jean-Louis Trintignant – Amour

Actress:
Who I Think Will Win: Jennifer Lawrence – Silver Linings Playbook
Who People Think Will Win: Tossup: Lawrence or Emmanuelle Riva – Amour
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Emmanuelle Riva – Amour
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Quvenzhane Wallis – Beasts of the Southern Wild (I shouldn’t use such language… she’s 9).
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Marion Cotillard – Rust and Bone

Supporting Actor:
Who I Think Will Win: Tommy Lee Jones – Lincoln
Who People Think Will Win: Robert DeNiro? It’s Literally a 5 way race
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Philip Seymour Hoffman – The Master
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Alan Arkin – Argo (He does nothing in that movie except be cranky. For about 9 minutes).
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Leonardo DiCaprio – Django Unchained

Supporting Actress:
Who I Think Will Win: Anne Hathaway – Les Miserables
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Anne Hathaway – Les Miserables
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Jacki Weaver – Silve Linings Playbook
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Ann Dowd – Compliance (Seriously. See this movie.)

Adapted Screenplay:
Who I Think Will Win: Tony Kushner – Lincoln
Who People Think Will Win: Chris Terrio – Argo
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Tony Kushner – Lincoln (because really… The man’s won a Pulitzer. He HAS to win…)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Chris Terrio – Argo (Notice a theme?)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Stephen Chbosky – The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Original Screenplay:
Who I Think Will Win: Michael Haneke – Amour
Who People Think Will Win: Mark Boal – Zero Dark Thirty
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Mark Boal – Zero Dark Thirty (but he won’t win because of liberals who think ZDT is about water boarding)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: John Gatins – Flight (see Denzel Washington – then blame this fucker for all of the problems)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Rian Johnson – Looper

Cinematography:
Who I Think Will Win: Claudio Miranda – Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Roger Deakins – Skyfall (10 Oscar nominations, no wins)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Robert Richardson – Django Unchained (He’s won 3)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Ben Richardson – Beasts of the Southern Wild

Costume Design:
Who I Think Will Win: Jacqueline Durran – Anna Karenina
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Jacqueline Durran – Anna Karenina
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Colleen Atwood – Snow White and the Huntsman (It’s honestly a nomination for Charlize Theron’s awesomeness)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Sharen Davis – Django Unchained

Film Editing:
Who I Think Will Win: William Goldenberg – Argo
Who I Think SHOULD Win: William Goldenberg AND Dylan Tichenor – Zero Dark Thirty (So it’s a win win for Goldenberg with 2 nominations in the same category. Good for him)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Jay Cassidy and Crispin Struthers – Silver Linings Playbook (Mostly for their names)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Beasts of the Southern Wild

Makeup: (I don’t care about their names)
Who I Think Will Win: Les Miserables
Who People Think Will Win: The Hobbit (No one really knows though… This category is fucked up)
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Les Miserables
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Hitchcock… No wait The Hobbit… GAH BOTH!
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): LINCOLN!!!!

Original Score:
Who I Think Will Win: Mychael Danna – Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Dario Marianelli – Anna Karenina
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: John Williams – Lincoln (It’s cliche to hate John Williams, and this isn’t his worst by a long shot… it’s just the worst of all of the nominees)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD! LISTEN TO THAT FIRST SONG NOW!

Original Song:
Who I Think Will Win: “Skyfall” – Skyfall
Who I Think SHOULD Win: “Skyfall” – Skyfall
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: “Suddenly” – Les Miserables (It was already 2 and a half hours. Did you really need another song?)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): “Who Did That To You” – Django Unchained

Production Design (Formerly Art Direction):
Who I Think Will Win: Anna Karenina
Who People Think Will Win: Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Skyfall
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: The Hobbit
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Prometheus

Sound Editing:
Who I Think Will Win: Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Life of Pi
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Argo
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Prometheus

Sound Mixing:
Who I Think Will Win: Les Miserables
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Les Miserables
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Lincoln
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Zero Dark Thirty

Visual Effects:
Who I Think Will Win: Life of Pi
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Life of Pi
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: The Hobbit (It actually looks worse because of the 48fps)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Skyfall

Foreign Language:
Who I Think Will Win: Amour
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Amour
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: I’ve only seen 3 but.. of those – War Witch
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): I’ve only seen a couple other foreign language movies but of those… Rust and Bone

Documentary:
Who I Think Will Win: Searching for Sugar Man
Who I Think SHOULD Win: How to Survive a Plague
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: The Invisible War (people think it’s more interesting than it is because it’s about a heavy topic)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): The Queen of Versailles

Animated:
Who I Think Will Win: Wreck-It Ralph
Who People Think Will Win: Wreck-It Ralph
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Frankenweenie by a mile
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: The Pirates! Band of Misfits
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): None. You know this is one of my favorite categories and this year I was sorely unimpressed. You’d really like Wreck-It Ralph, but it never really does anything more than be a good kids movie. Frankenweenie is fantastic. Brave is better than people gave it credit for. Paranorman is worse than people gave it credit for.

Documentary Short: (I saw all 5 of these)
Who I Think Will Win: Inocente (it’s about a homeless girl who paints)
Who People Think Will Win: Open Heart (it’s about Rwandan children getting heart surgery in Sudan)
Who I Think SHOULD Win: King’s Point (it’s about the painful melancholy of a nursing home)
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Open Heart (It says nothing.)
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Ummmmmm does Big Brother Season 14 count as a documentary short?

Live-Action Short:
Who I Think Will Win: Asad (It’s about Somalian Children)
Who People Think Will Win: Buzkashi Boys (It’s about Afghanistani children) OR Curfew (it’s about a suicidal drugee who’s babysitting his niece)
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Curfew
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: Henry
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): Ummmmmm

Animated Short:
Who I Think Will Win: Paperman
Who I Think SHOULD Win: Paperman
Which Nominee Can Go Fuck Themselves: I’ve only seen two! But probably The Simpsons
Should Have Been Here (That Actually Could Have Been Here): People LOVE something called The Eagleman Stag… I don’t really get it… in a good way.

February 20, 2013

The 2012 Golden Enchilada Nominees

I do these at my own time. And today is that time. I do them so late because I’m not a fancy professional with screeners. I have to watch movies on my own time, like the rest of you. I’m not complaining. I still make time to see most everything I want to. My goal for one year is to watch 100 releases. This year I got to 85. I’m okay with that because my slate of 85 was already so strong, some of these categories were impossible to choose. Impossible. So better fewer to choose from.

First things First, the obligatory Top 10:
1. Zero Dark Thirty
2. The Master
3. Sound of My Voice
4. Compliance
5. Beasts of the Southern Wild
6. Amour
7. Life of Pi
8. Killer Joe
9. Silver Linings Playbook
10. The Cabin in the Woods

Best Picture:

Amour

Amour

Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild

The Cabin in the Woods

The Cabin in the Woods

Compliance

Compliance

Killer Joe

Killer Joe

Life of Pi

Life of Pi

The Master

The Master

Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook

Sound of My Voice

Sound of My Voice

Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty

Best Director:

Paul Thomas Anderson The Master

Paul Thomas Anderson
The Master

Kathryn Bigelow Zero Dark Thirty

Kathryn Bigelow
Zero Dark Thirty

Michael Haneke Amour

Michael Haneke
Amour

Joe Wright Anna Karenina

Joe Wright
Anna Karenina

Benh Zeitlin Beasts of the Southern Wild

Benh Zeitlin
Beasts of the Southern Wild

Best Actor:

Bradley Cooper Silver Linings Playbook

Bradley Cooper
Silver Linings Playbook

Daniel Day-Lewis Lincoln

Daniel Day-Lewis
Lincoln

Philip Seymour Hoffman The Master

Philip Seymour Hoffman
The Master

Joaquin Phoenix The Master

Joaquin Phoenix
The Master

Jean-Louis Trintignant Amour

Jean-Louis Trintignant
Amour

Best Actress:

Jessica Chastain Zero Dark Thirty

Jessica Chastain
Zero Dark Thirty

Ann Dowd Compliance

Ann Dowd
Compliance

Jennifer Lawrence Silver Linings Playbook

Jennifer Lawrence
Silver Linings Playbook

Emmanuelle Riva Amour

Emmanuelle Riva
Amour

Naomi Watts The Impossible

Naomi Watts
The Impossible

Best Supporting Actor:

Tom Hiddleston The Avengers

Tom Hiddleston
The Avengers

Matthew McConaughey Killer Joe

Matthew McConaughey
Killer Joe

Ewan McGregor The Impossible

Ewan McGregor
The Impossible

Scoot McNairy Killing Them Softly

Scoot McNairy
Killing Them Softly

Sam Rockwell Seven Psychopaths

Sam Rockwell
Seven Psychopaths

Best Supporting Actress:

Amy Adams The Master

Amy Adams
The Master

Gina Gershon Killer Joe

Gina Gershon
Killer Joe

Anne Hathaway Les Miserables

Anne Hathaway
Les Miserables

Brit Marling Sound of My Voice

Brit Marling
Sound of My Voice

Juno Temple Killer Joe

Juno Temple
Killer Joe

Best Adapted Screenplay:

Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild
Lucy Alibar &
Benh Zeitlin

Life of Pi

Life of Pi
David Magee

Lincoln

Lincoln
Tony Kushner

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Stephen Chbosky

Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook
David O. Russell

Best Original Screenplay:

Amour

Amour
Michael Haneke

Compliance

Compliance
Craig Zobel

The Master

The Master
Paul Thomas Anderson

Sound of My Voice

Sound of My Voice
Zal Batmanglij

Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty
Mark Boal

Cinematography:

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Seamus McGarvey

Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild
Ben Richardson

Life of Pi

Life of Pi
Claudio Miranda

Magic Mike

Magic Mike
“Peter Andrews”

Skyfall

Skyfall
Roger Deakins

Costume Design:

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Jacqueline Durran

Django Unchained

Django Unchained
Sharen Davis

Les Miserables

Les Miserables
Paco Delgado

Moonrise Kingdom

Moonrise Kingdom
Kasia Walicka-Maimone

A Royal Affair

A Royal Affair
Manon Rasmussen

Film Editing:

Argo

Argo
William Goldenberg

Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild
Crocket Doob &
Affonso Goncalves

The Impossible

The Impossible
Elena Ruiz &
Bernat Vilaplana

The Master

The Master
Leslie Jones &
Peter McNulty

Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty
William Goldenberg &
Dylan Tichenor

Makeup:

The Impossible

The Impossible
Alessandro Bertolazzi

Les Miserables

Les Miserables
Lisa Westcott

Lincoln

Lincoln
Lois Burwell &
Kay Georgiou

Original Score:

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Dario Marianelli

Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild
Dan Romer &
Benh Zeitlin

Haywire

Haywire
David Holmes

The Master

The Master
Jonny Greenwood

Moonrise Kingdom

Moonrise Kingdom
Alexandre Desplat

Original Song:

Damsels in Distress

“The Sambola! International Dance Craze”
Damsels in Distress
Lou Christie,
Michael A. Levine &Mark Suozzo

Django Unchained

“Who Did That to You?”
Django Unchained
John Legend

Life of Pi

“Pi’s Lullaby”
Life of Pi
Mychael Danna & Bombay Jayashri

Skyfall

“Skyfall”
Skyfall
Paul Epworth &
Adele

Wreck-It Ralph

“When Can I See You Again?”
Wreck-It Ralph
Adam Young &
Owl City

Production Design:

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Sarah Greenwood & Katie Spencer

Life of Pi

Life of Pi
David Gropman &
Anna Pinnock

Moonrise Kingdom

Moonrise Kingdom
Adam Stockhausen &
Kris Moran

Prometheus

Prometheus
Arthur Max &
Sonja Klaus

Skyfall

Skyfall
Dennis Gassner &
Anna Pinnock

Sound Editing:

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Craig Berkey

The Impossible

The Impossible
Oriol Tarrago

Killing Them Softly

Killing Them Softly
Robert Jackson &
Thomas O’Neil Younkman

Life of Pi

Life of Pi
Philip Stockton

Prometheus

Prometheus
Victor Ray Ennis &
Mark P. Stoeckinger

Sound Mixing:

Amour

Amour
Jean-Pierre LaForce

Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina
Craig Berkey&
Chris Burdon

The Impossible

The Impossible
Marc Orts

Les Miserables

Les Miserables
Frederick Cuevas,
Reagan Mendoza,
Andy Nelson &
Mark Paterson

Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty
Paul N.J. Ottosson

Visual Effects:

The Avengers

The Avengers
Erik Nash,
Janek Sirrs,
Colin Strause,
Greg Strause,
Jeff White,
Guy Williams &
Daniel Sudick

The Impossible

The Impossible
Felix Berges &
Pau Costa

Life of Pi

Life of Pi
Erik De Boer,
Donald Elliott,
Guilaume Rocheron &
Bill Westenhofer

Prometheus

Prometheus
Charley Henley,
Martin Hill,
Richard Stammers & Trevor Wood

Skyfall

Skyfall
Chris Corbould,
Asregadoo Arundi,
Steven Begg&
Steve Moncur

Best Ensemble:

Argo

Argo
Casting: Lora Kennedy
Acting: Ben Affleck,
Bryan Cranston,
John Goodman,
Alan Arkin,
Tate Donovan,
Chris Messina,
Christopher Denham,
Victor Garber,
Scoot McNairy,
Kyle Chandler,
Rory Cochran,
Kerry Bishé,
Clea Duvall,
Sheila Vand &
Pat Leong

Killer Joe

Killer Joe
Casting: Denise Chamian
Acting: Matthew McConaughey,
Emile Hirsch,
Juno Temple,
Thomas Haden Church &
Gina Gershon

Lincoln

Lincoln
Casting: Avy Kaufman
Acting: Daniel Day-Lewis,
David Strathairn,
Tommy Lee Jones,
Lee Pace,
John Hawkes,
Joseph Gordon-Levitt,
Hal Holbrook,
Michael Stuhlbarg,
James Spader,
Jackie Earle Haley,
Tim Blake Nelson,
Bill Camp,
Gulliver McGrath,
Jared Harris,
Bruce McGill, Sally Field,
Gloria Reuben,
Elizabeth Marvel &
S. Epatha Merkerson

Moonrise Kingdom

Moonrise Kingdom
Casting: Douglas Aibel
Acting: Edward Norton,
Jared Gilman,
Bruce Willis,
Jason Schwartzman,
Bob Balaban, Bill Murray,
Harvey Keitel,
Kara Hayward,
Frances McDormand &
Tilda Swinton

Zero Dark Thirty

Zero Dark Thirty
Casting: Mark Bennett,
Richard Hicks &
Gail Stevens
Acting: Jessica Chastain,
Jason Clarke,
Reda Kateb,
Mark Strong,
Kyle Chandler,
Chris Pratt,
Harold Perrineau,
Edgar Ramirez,
Joel Edgerton,
Mark Duplass,
Stephan Dillane,
Martin Delaney,
John Barrowman,
James Gandolfini &
Jennifer Ehle

Ubiquity Award:

Mark Duplass

Mark Duplass
Safety Not Guaranteed, Your Sister’s Sister & Zero Dark Thirty

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Joseph Gordon-Levitt
The Dark Knight Rises, Lincoln, Looper & Premium Rush

Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey
Bernie, Killer Joe & Magic Mike

Michael Stuhlbarg

Michael Stuhlbarg
Hitchcock, Lincoln, Men in Black 3 & Seven Psychopaths

Channing Tatum

Channing Tatum
21 Jump Street, Haywire & Magic Mike

Movies I Wish I Rewarded More:

Frankenweenie

Frankenweenie

Looper

Looper

Pitch Perfect

Pitch Perfect

The Sessions

The Sessions

Seven Psychopaths

Seven Psychopaths

Movies I Regret Not Seeing:

Celeste and Jesse Forever

Celeste and Jesse Forever

Chronicle

Chronicle

Holy Motors

Holy Motors

Les Intouchables

Les Intouchables

No

No

Call Your Friends Award: (For 100% Recommend-ability across all four quadrants)

Life of Pi

Life of Pi

The Pants-Off Acting Hall of Fame Inductee:

Javier Bardem

Javier Bardem